Happy Birthday To Ye

Asullus Anguli XXI ... (Asullus’ Corner)

Happy Birthday To Ye

This week one o’ our Gentle Readers, a certain Peter McCarthy, who describes himself as a musician by trade, ha’ written an’ expressed an interest in knowin’ all the days that our heroines an’ heroes ha’ their birth ‘pon this earth.

Well, simple enou’. Let’s take a look through the files.

As per usual, yer old an’ faithful friend, Asullus, an’ the Spritae Morphia ha’ done some research an’ come up wi’ the information requested. No’ so sure why a person, especially a lute-player, be in need o’ these facts. P’rhaps he be plannin’ to write a song aboot it all sometime ?

In anyway, hope this shorter piece do go towards providin’ both him an’ ye some enjoyment in the readin’ time.

So, I was speakin’ wi’ dear Morphia an’ we decided to limit our birthday researchin’ to just the Eight Who Rode Forth on that day back when, as most o’ the scrolls do be spendin’ most o’ their time on these folks.

Our first, here, is Thaddeus o’ Beewicke, now known as Thaddeus o’ the Tower, plus some other identities in between.

Now wi’ him, I happens to know e’en when he was first put together, that bein’ All Hallow’s Eve, which was the very weddin’ day o’ his dear parents – Cedric and Hycynthya. So, ye can do the math if ye wishes, but he came out to greet the world the followin’ Maius 1, occurring some short time after the Spring Equinox, or Aequinoctium Vernum.

Now, however, we ha’ to put a hold on our inquiry as we are leavin’ blank a very important part o’ the lad’s birthday – the year.

Now in the scrolls as we ha’ ‘em from the custodians o’ the Past, you’re all sure to notice this important detail – there be no years. Ever. Anywhere.

So, Moprhia an’ meself started to look into that strange but common findin’ an’ we soon found what we thinks be the answer. It seems to be a case o’ no one knowin’ where to begin. What I’m proposin’ is that there be no consensus that is certain an’ fast as to when to begin countin’ time.

That do no’ mean, o’ course, that no one ’s tried. Many seem to ha’ done so. One counts from this event an’ another from that. It just be that there seems to be no total agreement. E’eryone ha’ his or her own opinions, an’, as we all knows, opinions be like bottoms, most e’erybody’s ha’ one.

Now, I knows this may be a bit o’ a slippery concept, so let me gi’ ye some beginnin’-o’-the-count examples an’ ye can, by there’pon, sees what I means. To wit…

So, if ye wishes to be most complete an’ start at the verra beginnin’, then yer count could be from the, alleged, time that A started things off by clappin’ his hands. An’ that, accordin’ to Master Anders would gi’ us a year o’ 13,800,000,015 as the time when our story begins, that bein’ the year old Master Silvestrus stopped by Beewicke, lookin’ fer me current Master, Thaddeus.

Howe’er, to this mule’s ears an’ eyes that do seem to be a most cumbersome figure an’ do no’ roll off the tongue so easily, methinks.

Next, ye could begin yer count with the time when the Earth an’ Mater Naturae sprang into bein’, which would gi’ us 4,600,000,015 as a counter. But this seems to meself to ha’ the same sort o’ limitations as besets the first number we talked o’.

Or, fer the more trauma-lovin’ o’ ye, ye could support the time when Luna first came into bein’ wi’ the crashin’ into, an’ violatin’ o’, the Lady an’ all that, gi’en ye a figure o’ 4,400,000,015. But I ha’ no particular care fer’ that date, wi’ all the meanin’ an’ such attached to it.

Some further dates suggest themselves, then, such as 5,000,000 wi’ the arrival o’ the Eldest or 1,500,000 wi’ the appearance o’ the Grandfathers o’ Man, or e’en 500,000 years when the Fathers o’ Man came aboot.

But if ye’re dedicated to this sort o’ datin’ Philosophy, I’d be inclined to go wi’ 250,015 wi’ the advent o’ True Man, him- or her-self. Now that seems to meself a better number than what we ha’ had so far, but it’s still no smoothy to me own mind.

Continuin’ on, we ha’ 10,015 years at which time the Daemon’s ha’ set up shop in the Tower in the Land o’ the Cin lookin’ e’er so similar in purpose, I’m thinkin’, to the recruitin’ tables o’ the Legions that the Centurians run so as to get the young men to sign up fer their dues. But the Politics o’ all that to do wi’ the Daemon might tend to deter me from that sort o’ datin’.

Now another promisin’ datin’ could be the Fall o’ Tyrannus Superbus an’ the Westlands Empire a millennia ago ‘pon his disastrous Cinnian campaign. Usin’ that timin’ would put the year o’ the beginnin’ o’ our story at 1015, which, to me own ears, is much more harmonious than anything as has come before. But there be a sadness aboot the settin’ o’ that date, it bein’ associated wi’ the deaths o’ at least a million o’ our boys fer no good cause that I could e’er see.

That leaves just two more possible dates that I can think o’, one bein’ 15, as the year our Thaddeus was born an’ the other, 0, bein’ the exact year o’ the startin’ o’ our story.

So, Gentle Readers, which is it to be? I s’pose were a fruit o’ the red type held up to be nose an’ I be encouraged to pick, it’d be the 10,015 date, but I be, in no way, wedded to such a figure. It just seems the least difficult to use, in some ways, out o’ the whole lot o’ ‘em.

But I’d be glad to be swayed to some other line o’ logic fer the dates. So, if any o’ ye Gentle Readers would like to send in yer thoughts on the matter, I’d be glad to view ‘em.

Now, then, where were we? Oh, yes, wi’ Master Thaddeus birthday, which, accordin’ to our new reckonin’ would be written as the First o’ Maius, 10,000.

So, then, next is Master Anders o’ Brightfield Manor to begin wi’ an’ o’ Fornia to end wi’. Now wi’ him, our story gets to be a little complicated. Technically, he came into this world on Year Day, 10,000. Now Year Day, or Dies Anni, as all know, is stuck between Bruma, or the day after the 30th o’ Saturnius, an’ the First o’ Ianuarius.

The young Master, ha’in’ the good fortune o’ bein’ born into an ample family, always ha’ much celebration an’ good cheer on his birthday, but in his later years, he did decide no’ to make a fuss wi’ presents an’ such at that time. “It’s so close to Saturnalia and the new year, that it’s all absorbed together anyway. And besides,” I ha’ witnessed him sayin’ while sittin’ beside his devoted bride an’ squeezin’ Mistress Nannsi’s hand in his, “I have all the presents here I would ever need.”

Now we comes to that red-headed thief an’ Consul o’ Frantillia (who could ha’ imagined that?). He ha’ always claimed he ha’ no idea o’ his birthdate, his situation bein’ somewhat ‘irregular’ as they says concernin’ his birth circumstances. Following the victory o’er the Cinnians, the new Emperor Akireu ‘suggested’ Fountaindale’s Burgomeister take a close look at the city’s records an’, I’m told, see if they might turn up papers regardin’ his Uncle’s history. Howe’er, though a most thorough search was made, alas, no solid date was e’er discovered.

Master Rolland said he cared no’ fer it, but I do think the search an’ all stirred up some old an’ hurtful feelin’s. His remedy, which seemed a goodly one to all, meself included, was then to peg his birthdate to his Brother Sorcerer’s, King Zoarr. The King was very supportive o’ this maneuver an’ made an official proclamation regardin’ it to all people an’ lands as far as his writ did extend.

It was, therefore, no’ so uncommon fer gifts an’ delights to arrive in Frantilla around the same time each year as did similar treasures arrive in Melisol. I believes this became a bit o’ sport an’ jest wi’ the two o’er time, the sayin’ bein’ that each just sent back to the other what the one ha’ received the year before. Would no’ surprise this old mule. No, no’ at all.

Speakin’ o’ the King o’ Mauretesia, his birthdate officially is recorded as the Solstitium, the day wedged in between the 30th o’ Iunius an’ the 1st o’ Iovius. So, as I ha’ said, he an’ his thievin’ Consular Brother do share this date. Considerin’ where each o’ these lads came from at the first, they did seem to evolve to this symbol becomin’ a mark o’ the love they shares wi’ each other, by me thinkin’.

Now, fer the Ladies. So, actually, it was easier to find the girls’ dates than the boys’ fer some reason. I ha’ no idea why, but my Lady, Mistress Marsia, ha’, from the first, been told that her date o’ birth is t’ward the end o’ summer on the 15th o’ Cerealis, 10,000.

Our Lady, the Sorceress Nannsi o’ Fornia, Teacher, Mistress o’ Nursery, Manager an’ Director o’ the Fornian Academy an’ Orphange an’ general Do-Goodin’ Person an’ Defender o’ one Anders, also o’ Fornia, ha’ the 1st o’ Uranius, 10,000, an’ that’d be the last o’ fall, as a birthdate. No’ such much more to say there, though I ha’ heard that o’er the years she ha’ come to encourage Vegetarianism in her charges. Meself, I see no problem wi’ this position, though I understand that those as ha’ canines may tend to disagree wi’ this particular point o’ view. Non nocebit.

So, let’s see, that leaves the Sorceress Sonnia, Consort to the Consul o’ all o’ Frantillia, an’ general Ruler o’ the Roost, if ye asks this old Mule. Her birthday comes early in the year toward the end of Winter on the 14th o’ Februarius, 10,000.

An’, finally, our dear, sweet Molly-o’-the-Willows, she o’ so many tragic adventures, she rightly deserves a whole set o’ scrolls to herself. Well, she be another o’ our Orphans wi’ no particular known date o’ birth, though her parents are well-known, though no’ discussed in Polite Company so much – bein’ Silvstrus o’ Somerset an’ Merriwhiddle o’ Maritanius.

So, she followed Master Rolland’s clever move an’ declared her birthdate to be the same as that o’ her husband’s, the current King o’ Mauretesia, that is, Mid-Sommer’s Day, the Solstitum, but wi’ a year o’ 9,996.

Well, there ye ha’ it, Gentle Readers all, the birthdates, close as we could get to ‘em, o’ our eight heroes.

So, next time we’ll be tacklin’ another o’ yer write-in questions as best as Morphia an’ I can address ‘em. Until then, try an’ do yer best an’ such.

Fare-thee-well.

Asullus

Mule-in-Residence

The Great North Tower, Northfast

Interested in how your birthdates correspond with those listed above and the true meanings of your Astrological Signs in the College of Sorcery’s Zodiac as presented on the system’s Tarot?

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